NEWS(Or until we have anything that you will find mildly entertaining, more information.)DooDah Information Attache, courtesy of bedarkened.com Hello. Thank you for calling the DooDah automated news and information system. We are your information attache and encyclopaedic assistant. Please hold extremely still and think pleasant thoughts while we muster the interest to speak to you. This may take a while. Oh, are you still there? Fine. If you have come here looking for more information than you could possibly fit into very small holes in a very large fish net, then you have most likely arrived at the wrong place. We do not do fish nets here; we are not that kind of establishment. OK, OK, maybe we do answer some questions. So if you are the persistent, annoying type, we suppose we can answer your petty, most likely uninteresting inquiries at this time. Of course, no offense to all you petty uninteresting folk; we have nothing against the mildly mundane, except that you may very well be destroying civilization as we know it, which in many cases could be considered a public service, so we guess we're moderately happy to be here with you after all. Even if only for a short bit. But we digress. Read. Slowly. WHENThe parade will take place, as the banner above very clearly states (as if you were paying attention), on January 20, 2008. That is this year, in case you have forgotten. The time is sometime after our morning constitutional and pitcher of martini, but slightly before our first nap. 11:30-ish, or so. Or later. Or maybe never, if you ask us again. And yes, "we are almost there yet," so please return to your seats and place your tray tables...well, nevermind. WHEREOld Town Pasadena, of course. Line the streets of Raymond and Colorado weeks, perhaps months, in advance, and wait patiently for the festivities to begin. Once underway, spend your time hoping to catch a hot, flying hot dog or two, and then subsequently hope that we don't snatch it from your boring little fingers. Why be worried, you ask? Because we're often hungry by around noon-ish, and we feel we are owed a stuffed tube of processed meat product or two for putting up with this abuse. WHOHere's the bit where you fit in. YOU can be involved, yes, even droll, unimaginative you, can be in a Parade (gasp!). And there will be others. There are always others. Of course, it is of little consequence to us either way if you participate, as we are perfectly self-satisfied (and might I add, extremely handsome in that devilish, Rose-Parade-royalty-gone-wrong kind of way), but if you really must get out your crazy hat then by all means, come and join us. HOW MUCHAs always, we are glad to accept as much money as you can possibly cough up so that we can enjoy the parade in style. However, due to a rather unfortunate mix-up with the authorities (otherwise affectionately known as, "The Man"), we are obligated to disclose that other than gathering the unwanted or unused cash or credit cards that our patrons often leave lying around in large, untended piles, we will gather no admission fees of any kind. It is (oh how this pains us) free of charge. This is subject to change at any time, particularly if we run out of money for spray cheese and beef jerky, but we seem to be fine so far. Or so we have told the parole board. If on the other hand, you want to participate in the parade as one of the many crazies marching down the street, there is a small fee per person in your entourage. See the DooDah application for details. Of course, you could, and probably should, donate something to the cause. We do so tire of ramen and beef jerky at times.
Thank you for using our top-of-the-line information attache system. You may press 0, or hang up at any time. Goodbye. OLD NEWS
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*UPDATE 11/13/05 [TIME CHANGE]*
What: The 2005 Pasadena Doo Dah Parade Queen Tryouts will take place Sunday, November 13th on a bohemian-inspired Altadena ranch site, accompanied by the majestic mayhem of Queen Mercy & the Royal Doo Dah Orchestra. Everyone interested is encouraged to try out!
